Blog

I missed my blog pretty badly over the last couple of months. Or so I thought. But in switching it back on, opening it up again, and generally getting ready to start writing in it again, I looked at some of the more recent posts, and I remembered how unhappy I'd been and for how long a time. A lot of that recent writing (I'm talking over the last two years) was done in a mood of despair, and because it was written in such coded and veiled ways, I read it now and felt transported irresistibly back to that mood of incommunicable sadness and to the isolation in which I dwelt.

I had my doctor, I had my friends and people who were important to me and who I trusted; same as I do now; but I felt alone and intolerably painfully so. I don't want to be reminded of that so I have archived the majority of posts written over the last couple of years. I didn't delete them, I've just hidden them.

I'm alone now but without despair and pain. Some time back, my husband and I separated. I like my new life just fine although it is really strange in many ways. Now I am not struggling under the immobilising burden of grief I intend to write again, here and also to stretch myself into other fora and make contact with a wider field of readers, and in so doing to deploy the skills I've found and tested over thousands of days of writing without needing please anyone but myself.

Also I am considering growing my hair long again.

Thanks for being here x