Saturday 14 January 2017

A challenger will arise

A. Reader has written in. Staggering astonishments will never, ever cease will they? Although I should not be too surprised because nothing motivates like seizing the opportunity to find and point out faults and flaws and most especially things that are considered to be fishy.

Reader is sceptical of the claim advanced in my last bloggerly masterpiece, ie that I managed to make myself vomit by laughing at something on the internet.

WHY THE CRAP WOULD I LIE ABOUT THIS, or anything else I bothered to write down here for the edification of myself and whoever you are? Really, why? Well, now I feel I have to justify myself. I will spell it out then, on condition that in future a little more good faith is extended in this direction.

The simple fact is, I have a gross cold that came on about a week ago, and as always when I get a cold, it's now just a hacking cough which disgusts and annoys everybody within sight and earshot. I laughed a lot and it irritated my already sore thoat, the laugh turned into a cough, I coughed / laughed till I gagged, and just like that, up came the contents of my stomach, that being a beetroot icy pole and quite a lot of phlegm. Sorry but I didn't take a photo. The couch I was sitting on is old leather and it has seen absolutely everything that human beings can spill, eject and excrete, so no lasting damage was done, not even to my dignity and sense of self-worth which has taken far severer blows than this and still emerged in tip-top condition. That reminds me, I might as well write my next post about the thing I did on my first day back at work from maternity leave. Probably, no undoubtedly, the most bloggable experience of my entire life, what a shame it would be not to commit it to the internet for ever and ever.

I didn't go into all of this yesterday because it didn't seem relevant to the overall thrust of the narrative, and also I suppose that I was operating on the assumption that within the confines of my own blog I get to make the decisions about what needs to be spelled out and what doesn't.

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