Well, here I am at the end of the first week of maternity leave, I went to work every day except yesterday anyhow, and will probably go in again on Monday too. I'm trying to sneak around so nobody sees me, but within five seconds of walking up to my office door this morning I was loudly mocked by both the department admin officers. I am finding it very hard to mentally disengage, and although all the things I've been working on and the things I'm still fiddling with are personal projects, not teaching, it's because of having begun to teach the semester that I can't switch off. It's like trying to nerve yourself up to jump off a moving train. Ideally, somebody would throw me off so I wouldn't have to make the effort myself.
Back last year some time I did ask my obstetrician whether she thought I'd be able to stay at work until about 2-3 weeks before the expected delivery date (sorry, I think I might have mentioned this already) and she very quickly put the dampeners on that idea. Now that I am at the 34-and-a-bit weeks mark I can really see how right she was. Work is too much. I generally start about 9 and am half dead by 11. I've given several lectures over the last few weeks and at first I was very disconcerted by the sound of my own voice - it was quavery and nervous-sounding. After a bit I figured out this was because of the drastically reduced diaphragm and lung capacity; lecturing needs a lot of deep breaths and I only have shallow ones at present. It's better not to be teaching any more for other reasons too; the baby doesn't move as frequently as he was doing a month or so ago, but when he does wriggle now it's a major and highly visible undertaking, and he happened to roll right over while I was standing at the whiteboard in front of a room full of first years who all shrieked in horror at the sight and instantly lost whatever slight and flagging interest they'd had in learning the correct way to format a quotation.
Today is the day, though, that I'm considering myself *really* on leave from work and to mark the occasion I'm going out this evening to the bright lights of Doncaster to see Barry Morgan's World of Organs at the theatre Dorian programs. Dorian was saying last night that he is fairly sure many of the people who have bought tickets are not expecting comedy. I certainly hope this proves to be the case.
So next week begins the proper pre-baby leave period for me; I hope I'll be able to spend a couple of weeks at least in resting and doing the things I really want to do before he comes out. I envisage my days unfolding something like this:
7-8 Breakfast with Dorian, bit of house cleaning, wash and dress
9.30-10.30 bit of gardening, weather permitting
10.30-11 morning tea whilst fighting on the internet
1-2 lunch, at home or out, and a walk
3-5.30 cook or read, bit more internet fighting
5.30-6.30 talk to Dorian, eat dinner
6.30-8 walk or swim
8-10 play with baby's toys, generally potter around, maybe some more sewing or a bit of TV
10 go to bed
I know it doesn't look terribly restful. I might need more naps and more reading, I guess. But a lot of those things are things I've been hanging out to do, and will be fun.
I've got a lot of sewing lined up. A lot. Most for the baby, both clothing and general linen, some for me (hospital stuff and maybe some breastfeeding-friendly shirts and dresses) some dull household stuff as well. I did get the curtains made for his room and they look great. I'll take a picture on the next day that isn't overcast.